Me: “Honey, do I look nice today?”

YS: “Yes. I really like your necklace. It’s a happy necklace.”

—

Me: “Do I need to shave?”

YS: “No, you’re Polish.”

—

Me: (upon serving YS his second large helping of casserole) “So, you like this recipe?”

YS: “It’s okay, but I wouldn’t make it again.”

—

YS: (upon seeing an older woman with very large hair) “Whoa! She could be on Christian television!”