The New (and Improved?) Yooper Stewart

0220170943a_500x1000He did it!

Yooper Stewart finished his first solo week driving in his own truck. He drove to Connecticut through a winter storm, was woken up at 1 a.m. for a 5 a.m. delivery, and managed to drive 3,000 miles total.

The Saturday after his week ended, his company threw an employee party to celebrate people for their years of service and to recognize the company’s 45th anniversary. We decided to attend so YS and I could meet more of his co-workers. I also thought it would be a good opportunity to help him organize his truck (though he wasn’t sure that he wanted the help).

When I arrived, Yooper Stewart looked the same, but something had changed. I didn’t realize it yet, but after five weeks on the road (one by himself), YS had had a heart change. Miraculously he did two things he’s never done before.


  1. He wanted to go to a party. That’s right – no more waiting until the last minute with me dragging him behind me as he tries to come up with a good reason why he should be able to skip another social function. I knew my bearded introvert would enjoy his alone time in the truck, but I didn’t realize that all that alone time would awaken his social side and lead him to seek out personal interactions. Not only did we arrive early, we were one of the last few people to leave.
  2. He let me organize his things. I’m a natural organizer. Yooper Stewart is not. I’ve been begging him for years to let me help him organize his office, but he’s never let me. After a tiring week on the road in a cramped, disorganized truck, however, he was willing to let me try. And he liked the results. (Maybe now he’ll let me into his office!)

0219171919_500x1000To celebrate his first successful week, he celebrated like any good redneck – with a medium-rare ribeye (thank you Mom and Aunt Linda for the gift card!).

With his first week behind him, he’s feeling more confident and relaxed. He’s ready to take on his first month, his first summer, his first year. (And I’m ready to take on his office…)

Yooper Stewart and the Door-to-Door Salesman


Kirby & Yooper Stewart get serious.

Monday evening Yooper Stewart and I sat down to a yummy dinner of baked chicken, carrots, and asparagus. We’d just come back from a jog, so our sweaty, disheveled bodies needed some fuel. As soon as my bottom hit the seat, someone knocked on the door.

Mistake #1: I opened the door.

Mistake #2: I didn’t immediately close the door.

Before I knew it, this strange man was walking toward us carrying two boxes. I looked to YS for guidance. Having already eaten his dinner, he shrugged and sauntered into the living room. Well, fine then. If he didn’t mind, I didn’t mind. I stood in the kitchen eating as the Kirby salesman demonstrated his goods.


The test drive.

I can’t even imagine what this poor guy thought. Not only has it been longer than I want to admit since I’ve cleaned my house, but Yooper Stewart presents a unique picture on a good day. Post-run, without warning, he’s in red and blue plaid pajama pants (yes, he ran in those) and a BRIGHT yellow shirt (which he eventually covered with a camouflage hoodie). Having just tortured myself with a run, I didn’t look much better (the hair flying out of my ponytail resembled the rings of Saturn).

Despite our appearances, I could see the hamster wheel turning in YS’s head – as long as we had company, he was going to enjoy it. He grabbed himself a beer, then sat down for the demo.


Yes, the vacuum has the option to be handheld for furniture and stairs, but where’s the fun in that?

I’ve mentioned this before, but it bears repeating: YS is funny. Sleep deprived, slap-happy YS is hysterical. One of SHYS’s (slap-happy Yooper Stewart) best traits is his loose tongue. You can’t shut the man up. Kirby now knows how long we’ve been married, how long we’ve owned the house, why YS wants acreage, how we picked the cats’ names, YS favorite color car, why the Camaro isn’t running, the details of every job YS has ever worked, and, of course, that I don’t vacuum often enough.

If I had to pick a single, favorite moment of the night, however, it would be when YS confessed that he’s the world’s largest eight year-old child. Here’s how it went:

Kirby: Do you have any questions?

YS: This may sound funny, but it’s serious. How does your vacuum handle LEGOs, cuz I’m an AFOL. You know, Adult Fan of LEGO.

Even as I write this, my head shakes involuntarily and I have to fight the urge to face-palm.


That’s one happy redneck …

Overall, the evening turned out pretty well. The demo went well (though we didn’t buy a vacuum), YS didn’t have to worry about after-dinner entertainment, and I ended up with a great blog post topic. Though I’m generally not a huge fan of last minute plan changes, this one worked out.